So, I have an interview with the oncology department on Wednesday. I guess I'm testing the waters again, or something. Maybe it's my undiagnosed ADD flaring up, or melancholia creeping back into my mind, but either way I'm going to see if it's something I'd be interested in. Barring any serious differences in pay, or sudden gut feelings against it, (or the possibility that they don't offer me the job...) I may well try it out and moonlight in the ER. There's something about considering leaving the ER for good that makes me shake inside. Kind of like how I feel when I think about quitting smoking (picture large anxiety attacks coupled with withdrawl symptoms). I really hate loving the ER so much, and knowing in my head that no matter what happens that day and how many times I say I hate it, tomorrow I'll be ready to do it all over again. It's kind of like being married to an abuser, I think. I hate what it does to me, but I love it so much that I stay. Ugh. To be continued....
P.S. Welcome to the newest blogger on my list--RedHat6. An impressively intelligent man with many witty, sarcastic things to say; and a talented EMS medic to boot. I miss ya, but this shall help with the lonelys. Glad you're here!
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3 comments:
If it ends in you staying full time I the ER, well...then so be it. In the end I have to set my feelings aside on this and support you in your choice.
Love you.
And I completely understand that cycle. Knowing that someday my kidneys will be shot because I don't take the time to pee a few times a shift; knowing I'll end up with varicose veins and a bad back and plantar fasciitis before I'm old... Getting irritated with the drunks and the seekers and the entitled masses... And still looking forward to the start of the next shift. (shrug) Glad to have a like-minded soul there in the trenches with me though.
Emergency medicine does that to you. After 15 years of it I can honestly say it destroys marriges and will eat your soul if you let it. Make sure moving is what you want than do it and don't look back. If your not ready than DONT DO IT! I love and miss you guys!
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